There I found myself in front of the camera, wondering if I should be bending my knee a little…
When Mary asked if we’d join her in sharing women’s style and stories, I jumped at the idea. Of course! I love hearing people’s stories. Key word, right there. Hearing. It didn’t occur to me that my story would be a subject matter and it just might involve having a picture (and a few wardrobe changes) taken. But hey, what do they say about the infamous comfort zone? We set the photoshoot date and while there was a little pit in my stomach, I knew it was good. That is, until the night before. I was picking out outfits, which should have been easy because it’s what I wear every day, right? Holding up combos in front of the mirror, I for some reason found myself asking, ‘I wear this, right?’
And that’s where it began.
The questions seeped into the following day’s shoot. Is that how I stand? Does this look good? Where should my hands go? That’s really how I smile? Should I hold my sunglasses? Am I walking weird? Thoughts on bending my knee? Oh, maybe straight is better…
Before I knew it, things I’d never even given a second thought to, were making me second guess myself. Act natural, I told my racing thoughts. But that’s when it hit me. Could those words be any more of an oxymoron?
Being in front of a camera can so easily pressure us to put on a show. Act a certain way. Dress a certain way. Look a certain way. Do a certain thing. Not do another. Be a somebody, when in reality, all we really want captured is ourselves.
After what felt like some rough moments, I found myself saying to our photographer, just get candid stuff. Instead of trying to pose, it felt more normal to have a conversation and what ended up happening was so welcomed. I got to hear stories again. Anna talking about her latest adventure with the cats. Michelle talking about her journey with photography and the last wedding she shot. Liana with her sense of humor all over everything. It was natural and I began to feel it.
In bringing all of us women together, Mary’s removed the word “act” from our stories. We have the opportunity to open up and just be ourselves, trusting we’ll be loved for it. I respect the women who’ve gotten in front of a camera, shared their story and owned their style. Because hey, when it comes down to it, we should be proud! Proud of each other, of ourselves and whatever we decide to put on. (and yep, proud of however that knee bends)
Article written by: Kiera Jacobson